That's what friends are for

I know you have heard the expression that people come into your life for a reason. Sometimes they come into your life for a short of period of time but that person wasn't meant to be in your life forever.

I was able to accept that for a few exceptions. Now I'm not going to list them but you know who you are.

I have a friend whom I miss terribly. Let me make an addendum to my previous statement. When people are in your life they don't have to be up under you every day to have an impact. I can totally understand if your adult life doesn't allow you the time to talk on the phone everyday and give a minute by minute play by play. But my friend whom I miss I know nothing about her and I mean absolutely nothing. It's scary because at one point I knew everything about her. For example when I sent her a text to tell her happy birthday she told me her grandmother was dying. I know how crazy it gets when a family member is sick and dying but I told her to text me the information about the service. I wanted to go and be there for her mom, her and the rest of her family. I text her last night and give my love to her grandparents to find out that her grandmother had passed.

I remember when my father died she was one of the first people I called. And she was there for me in ways I don't know if I could ever repay.

Did we fight? No. Is she really made at me for something I am not sure I did? According to her no. So why don't we speak anymore. I think I can handle not speaking for periods of time its the disconnect that kills me. Or maybe its me? Am I so self absorbed with my personal shit that my friends don't want to come to me? I really hope not.

So what do you do when you have a disconnect and you really want to be connected to a person. Do you force yourself back into their life? I blame technology for this. I have friends that you can pick up the phone to call and won't answer your phone call but are on top of a text. We used to send birthday cards but then we had the phone. After the phone came the pager. Then cell phones exploded and you could just leave a voicemail. After cell phones exploded, the text message became king. Now you can go months or even years without speaking to someone. I have friends that if I forget to call them for their birthday I will make sure I post a message on facebook or myspace.

I have an early new year's resolution. I'm going to try to call people more. Even if it is just on birthdays and holidays. Sometimes you have to hear someones voice just to have that piece of mind that everything is OK.