And you wonder...

We need help. We have to figure out as white men have been able to do all this time is to put a positive spin on negative publicity. We need to prevent things like this from happening and/or keep it out of the news.

This lady is a double whammy. She screws Obama and Palin.

Thank you to the good people at Crunktastcial for posting this.

Woman in cow costume arrested

MIDDLETOWN - A 32-year-old woman was sentenced to a month in the Middletown Jail Monday after she was arrested and charged with chasing children, blocking traffic and yelling at police - all while wearing a cow costume. Michele Allen pleaded guilty Monday in Middletown Municipal Court to one count of disorderly conduct, court officials said.

Middletown police said she chased children in the 3100 block of Wilbraham Road and urinated on a neighbor's porch Saturday night. An officer ordered her to go home and stay there.

About 11 p.m., police were called to the 2400 block of North Verity Avenue after receiving a report that a woman in a cow costume was blocking traffic.

Allen had alcohol on her breath, slurred her words, was belligerent and swore at the officer, a report states. Source


Now this fool.

I wonder if you get a door prize for number 2,000?

Kentucky Man Arrested For 1,000th Time

LEXINGTON, Ky. (WKYT) -- He's hit another a milestone. A Lexington man, famous for how many times he's been arrested, took his 1,000th trip to jail.

Police arrested Henry Earl for alcohol intoxication, a charge he's faced hundreds of times before. Earl is a pseudo-celebrity because of his extensive record. He's been featured on late night talk shows and has several websites dedicated to tracking his arrest record.

Earl's 1,000th arrest happened late Monday night on South Limestone. He'll be in court Tuesday afternoon to answer to this latest charge.

If you're wondering what 1,000 arrests equals, here's a look at Henry Earl's history.

In all, he's spent 4,123 days in jail.

35 of his 1000 arrests have been this year alone, landing him behind bars 189 days in 2008.

On average, Earl is out of jail about two days before he lands back behind bars, although this time he was out for four days before his latest arrest.


Copyright 2008 by The Associated Press. All Rights Reserved. Source

Gotcha!!

Gotcha Journalism.

She was talking to a voter.

If she is being outsmarted by the voter how will she fair in world affairs. How many times do I have to say the same thing over and over again before it is heard.

Hypocrisy is a bitch.

I don't know what I'm more excited to see. The actual vice presidential debate or Tina Fey on SNL making fun of the debate.

Someday...

I Hear Alicia

I hear Alicia Keys. I've been hearing her for a few weeks now and damnit she is talented. As I grow older and wiser I've learned how to decipher the crap I read on Okayplayer. I've read people write things like with every album that Alicia Keys has the music gets worse. I don't see that as possible. But I guess that is just my opinion.

I've been listening to the Alicia Keys Unplugged album more than anything and I have to see her live one day. If just to hear her sing this song.

If I were you woman
And you were my man
You'd have no other woman
You'd be weak as a lamb
If you had the strength
To walk out that door
My love would over rule my sense
And I'd call you back for more

If I were your woman
If you were my woman
If I were your woman
If you were my woman
If I were your woman
If you were my woman
And you were my man

Yeah
She tears you down Darling
Says you're nothing at all
But I'll pick you up Darling
When she lets you fall
You're like a diamond
And she treats you like glass
Yet you make it hard to love you
But Babe don't ask

If I were your woman
If you were my woman
If I were your woman
If you were my woman
If I were your woman
If you were my woman
Here's what I'd do
I'd never no, no, no stop loving you

Yeah
Life is so crazy
And love is unkind
Because she came first
Will she hang on your mind
You're a part of me
And you don't even know it
I'm what you need
But I'm too afraid to show it

If I were your woman
If you were my woman
If I were your woman
If you were my woman
If I were your woman
If you were my woman
Here's what I'd do
I'd never, no, no, no stop loving you

If I were your woman
Here's what I'd do
I'd never, never, never stop loving you
If I were your woman
You're sweet lovin' woman

If I were your woman
If you were my woman
If I were your woman
If you were my woman
If I were your woman
If you were my woman...

...you'd need no other woman

My line sister said to me one day (we were in the car and the Jagged Edge remake of Come and Talk to Me came on) she understands why her parents got mad when they heard one of their songs remade on the radio. That Jagged Edge song was just garbage.

I love Gladys and no one will ever do this song like her, but I think Ms. Keys comes in a distant second.

OK I hate the clock in the middle but I wanted Gladys live.






















































...distant second

Tina Fey does it Again

Tina Fey is just brillant.

How to Be a Bad Writer (in 10 Easy Lessons) By Langston Hughes

Another Gem from Okayplayer courtesy of Damali.

HOW TO BE A BAD WRITER (in Ten Easy Lessons) by Langston Hughes
1. Use all the cliches possible, such as "He had a gleam in his eye," or "Her teeth were white as pearls."

2. If you are a Negro, try very hard to write with an eye dead on the white market--use modern stereotypes of older stereotypes--big burly Negroes, criminals, low-lifers and prostitutes.

3. Put in a lot of profanity and as many pages as possible of near pornography and you will be so modern you pre-date Pompei in your lonely crusade toward the best seller lists. By all means, be misunderstood, unappreciated and ahead of your time in print and out, then you can be felt sorry for.

4. Never Characterize Characters. Just name them and then let them go for themselves. Let all of them talk the same way. If the reader hasn't imagination enough to make something out of cardboard cut-outs, shame on him!

5. Write about China, Greece, Tibet, or the Argentine pampas--anyplace you've never seen and know nothing about. Never write about anything you know, your hometown, or your home folks, or yourself.

6. Have nothing to say, but use a great many words, particularly high-sounding words, to say it.

7. If a playwright, put into your script a lot of hand-waving and spirituals, preferably the ones everybody has heard a thousand times from Marion Anderson to the Golden Gates.

8. If a poet, rhyme June with moon as often and in as many ways as possible. Also, use thee's and thou's and 'tis and o'er, and invert your sentences all the time. Never say "The sun rose, bright and shining." But, rather, "Bright and shining rose the sun."

9. Pay no attention really to spelling or grammar or the neatness of the manuscript. And in writing letters, never sign your name so anyone can read it. A rapid scrawl will better indicate how important and how busy you are.

10. Drink as much liquor as possible and always write under the influence of alcohol. When you can't afford alcohol yourself, or even if you can, drink on your friends, fans and the general public. If you are white, there are many more things I can advise in order to be a bad writer, but since this piece is for colored writers, there are some things I know a Negro just will not do not even for writing's sake, so there is no use mentioning them.

PWD

Posting while drunk

I am too old to use liquor as an excuse for the drunk phone call. I don't know if I'm drunk or just really nice either way I have something to say.

I went to the nail salon today for a pedicure and when the lady took the polish she told me my toe nail was about to fall off.

It had broken at the bottom and the crazy thing was it had already started to grow back

I didn't feel it

Has anyone else lost a toe nail and just didn't know about it?

I didn't want her to cut. Never lost an entire toe nail before didn't want to let go.

We just put polish over it and decided to keep it moving.

Presidential Debate Part 1

I'm so vexed at C-SPAN right now. I started to record the debate on Channel 7 but cancelled that in favor of C-SPAN. Its a good thing I turned it to C-SPAN to find out I would have taped an hour and half of Congressional Session.

Obama: Orgy of Spending

McCain: Maverick from the Senate and I have a Maverick that is with me. I think I can count on my one hand the amount of times I've seen those two together since she accepted the nomination. Sarah Palin makes women look bad. I love Senator Clinton and I think she would have made a great president or even vice president. I understand why Obama didn't chose her.

But...I would have given a months salary to see Senator Clinton debate Governor Palin. Shit I will take a Chelsea Clinton Palin debate.

I want to listen to John McCain but it scares me that his face doesn't move when he speaks.

I don't think Obama should give a definite timeline for withdrawal and aid to soldiers in Iraq.

What I don't understand the McCain platform. How to speak of change when you support the reason we need the change.

McCain I'm getting a little tired of the war references. I don't know if he is doing that to show strength or is that shell shock that is just coming out.

I think McCain is a hypocrite to talk about prudence and not saying everything that you think. Bush does that shit all the time.

Where does McCain have all of these town hall meetings? I know he never had one in New York.

Obama: No US solider ever dies in vain.

McCain: League of Democracy? Ummm yeah. Sounds similar to that thing we've had since 1945.

Did he stutter or was that the early stages of a slight stroke?

I think it is important to mention that Senator Obama spoke of Iran as an emerging threat

Maybe he is not looking at Obama, because the has too much botox in his face and can no longer move his neck?

McCain have your own opinion the question was your stance on Russia not what was wrong with Senator Obama's statement

I'm glad Lehrer recognizes that McCain just repeated what Obama said.

Even though McCain has been friends for 35 years I'm glad Obama has more knowledge of his opinion

I think I am developing a crush on Senator Obama

If I watch this again I will edit.

Little Gems From OkayPlayer

Sometimes you have to get past the post titled "You shoulda married that light skinned girl" or the "how do you masturbate" post to find some little gems of wisdom on the boards. I've seen them several times over the years and decided to start recording them in my own little piece of the blogger sphere. I can't really say I'm sharing it with the world because I have no readers but I digress. Maybe lack of readers is a good thing after my "Streams of Consciousness" (Courtesy of Kristy)

Now a little background to keep you up to speed. Okayplayer loryn (also a soror of mine) just broke up with her boyfriend. Well he broke up with her after a year and a half. I guess it took him that long to figure out there was no spark.

Shay Butta says,

"New People, New Places, NEW STUFF!
Mourn.
Grieve.
It IS a loss.
But ultimately, the more time you spend mourning people who have, for whatever reason, decided to move on, the less time you could be applying yourself to finding the new people, new places and new stuff.Feel however you need to feel.
But remember, you got new people, new places and new stuff waiting on you.Don't keep it waiting too long.

It's a loss.You were digging or even LOVING this person, and they just decide they wanna leave for whatever reason.And no reason they give you is gon be good enough, but the reason they gave you is particularly lame.It sucks.It hurts.Cry. Acknowledge it, cause if you don't, it's gon come knock you on your ass later.Take this whole week and feel it. Confront the memories.But October 1st? See about some of that new stuff! EmptyComp is right--turn to friends and try to get out the house.I usually prescribe 6 months of singlehood for every year y'all were together--it takes that long sometimes to get back to You, you know.

"NOOOOO MA'AM"
Set your Breakup Meter to "1" and KEEP IT MOVING.That "open to getting back together" shit is just his way of 'letting you down easy', cause if he really wanted to be with you and try to make it work, he wouldn'ta left.Fuck im.Great guy, yeah, yeah, yeah, but seriously, he's bogus for that one.I hate to quote that book, but yeah, if he were really feelin you and down to make it work, he wouldn'ta broke up with you.


Cocoapeach says,

"Oh God, this right here is some boolsheet"
He got it good, done got bored, wants to get with other girls while you waiting in the wings for a "possible" future that may never happen. Sheeeeyit. Wanna be friends bullshit. He done forgot what you are worth.

Binlahab says, Advice from men is always welcome. Its damn near Gospel.

"don't be that chick"
if its over let it be over that means no friends dont be his insurance policy

Well I dogded that Bullet

This situation is resolved and it has worked in my favor.

I am breathing a much needed sigh of relief.

Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh

I got a new attitude!!!!! *singing like Patti*

I've updated the look of the blog. I really should be asleep but can't fall asleep.

By tomorrow night I will have a new financial plan

Hopefully by October I will have a new place to live.

Flex goes in on R Kelly

I found this by way of Fwmj's website who I found by way of Okayplayer. I noticed something as of this week. I haven't listened to anything of R Kelly's since the verdict came him acquitting him of child pornography.

When Halle Berry and Eric Benet divorced I was on the "I hate Eric Benet" bandwagon but then I heard his new song.

I liked it.

I decided from then on that what artists did in their personal life should have no bearing on if I like their music. I was able to separate what happened between Eric and Halle. Why can't I accept the fact that R Kelly was found not guilty by a jury of his peers.

His appearance on BET sums it up. It's not the only thing. You know when you hear enough grease about a person constantly after a while it starts to have a ring of truth.

Exhibit #1.

Exhibit #2

Exhibit #3

What is a teenager? I like 19 year olds?

Post Over.

One Knee Jerk Decision to the Next

To get my mind off of the fact that I actually said yes I did something I hadn't done in over a month.

I put my match.com profile back up with pictures. I haven't given them any money nor do I think I will. But needless to say I put myself back on the market.

It's been a month. It took me about two months to find him. It may take longer to find the next one.

I still miss him and think about him often.

I think about the quiet and peace in his house.

I think about sleeping next to him in his bed.

I think about his Cologne.

I want to call him but I know I shouldn't

What's so different (c) Ginuwine

The last time I was honestly searching for the one. This time not so much.

I will probably delete it in the morning.

Ok Just Breathe

I have a headache now

I think I need some bush tea

My grandma if she were alive would give me bush tea

I already know what my dad would have said

I should try to go to sleep

No Seriously

What did I just say yes to? I'm scared. I almost want to call a doctor.

I know she is shady

You know this is bad news

Will this possibly mess up your current situation

You know it will

You know they are nosy

You know you love your privacy

You know this is a bad idea

But you still said yes.

Yes

You ever say yes to something then instantly regret it the second the words left your lips?

Yeah I'm going through that right about now.

I Told You So

I told you Elizabeth Hasselbeck aint shit.

She sat there and allowed Walters to hand McCain's ass to him on a plate.

You have to Really Worry

About people that use fear to win elections. I like how we conveniently forget that at one point in this country's history the elite and powerful used fear to justify slavery and sexism.

Fear of terrorism, fear of God and fear of liberal ideals has helped the Republican party win the last two elections. After scaring the American people on those issues what is next? I can tell what is next is a continued build up of intolerance for anyone that does not share your morals and ideals.

Who is really listening to this chick?

I would they would stop treating like this reality show reject like her opinion really matters.

The Word of the Day: Tired

Too tired to write but still felt compelled to write something. I have a few saved posts that need to be revised. Hope to get to this this weekend

Your Making Me High, I-Pod Fun

Rules 1. Put your itunes/music player on shuffle

2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer

3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER WHATAfter you’ve answered all of the questions, tag 5 other people and then let them know they’ve been tagged to do the meme themselves!ok. heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeere we go...



IF SOMEONE SAYS “IS THIS OKAY” YOU SAY?"
Unknown - Dwele

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?"
Resentment - Beyonce (Damn)

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Slow Down - Alicia Keys

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY
Por La Via Dolorosa (It is Sunday - not when i created this post but when I'm doing it)

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE??
5 Steps - Dru Hill

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?" I Hope Not
You Used to Love Me - Faith Evans


WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?" That is so fitting. Both of my parents are huge Otis Redding fans
I've Been Loving You Too Long - Otis Redding

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?" If you don't know why this is funny you don't read my blog
Lost In Love New Edition

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?"
Save Room - John Legend

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?" - I really dont have one now
When I'm Born With You Again - Billy Preston and Syreeta

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY? If Amy lives another year I will ask for permission to make this the title of my autobiography
Some Unholy War - Amy Winehouse

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?" That can be symbolic and I see the connection
Mirror - Neyo

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Treat U Right - Donnell Jones

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Memories - Beenie Man

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?" That is cool. Anything by Jill is just cool
Rightness - Jill Scott

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL
This Place Hotel - Michael Jackson

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Yuh Nuh Ready for Dis Yet - Tanya Stephens

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
You Make Me Wanna - Usher

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Allentown - Billy Joel

WHAT SHOULD YOU POST THIS AS?
Your Making Me High - Toni Braxton (reggae mix)

Two sides of a Coin

Bristol Palin is pregnant. We all know this and we all know that Bristol Palin is not the first and the last teenage girl to get pregnant. Do we pass judgement on her parents? Well maybe her father. But we all know what teenage girls are like they are going to do what the want to do regardless. Any kid that grew up with siblings knows at least one kid in the family isn't going to turn out right. There is going to be at least one kid that is going to make the parents think what did we do wrong?

Bristol Palin's pregnancy brings to light many things about the tactics of the Republican party. The one thing you can say about the Republican Party is they may not know how to run a country but they know how to win a campaign. They are all about strategy, maybe that is why they love to invade countries and plan wars. They are good at planning and good at winning. We have to look at John McCain choosing a random woman from Alaska as his running mate. Pure tactic. They have a lot of faith in John McCain's health because I really don't.

I have a major issue with the Republican Party.

It's not the conservative views I've always considered myself to be more of a moderate Democrat. Some things in this world need a conservative view to it. But what bothers me the most is this attitude of its the conservative way or you are a bad American. Why does life have to be rigid? And clearly with the current times the old way isn't working. Sarah Palin is all for conservative values but that still didn't stop her own daughter from going against them.

I had more to say but this was a saved post. I'm going to leave this be for now.

Reason # 4,080

Why I need to move out of my house. Other than my constantly deteriorating relationship with my mother and brother I am way over due.

As we all know because of August's tirade of posts I was just in a relationship. During this relationship I spent nights at this his house house and never told my mom where I was. Even though I didn't tell her where I was sleeping I am sure she knew. All of a sudden I was sleeping out spending every weekend with a guy.

Now me and the guy are broken up and I am back to be at home on weekends. What happens with the next guy. Even its a year from now I still look like a ho.

And the search continues....

90210

I was going to just DVR it and watch it at a later time but of course Dana is watching and had to call me to comment.

Dana told me that they have Andrea's daughter and Erin Silver on the show. Of course Dana and I knew when they were born on the old version and luckily the producers of this new show kept up the timeline.

What kills be about this show is the token black kid Dixon. Its nice they went all Brad and Angie and adopted a black kid but why couldn't there be a black family? Is it so hard to believe that a black family lives in Beverly Hills and has the same yuppy issues as other white kids?

Since when do high school girls give head in the parking lot.

What is that girl like 30. That was a great poke at the old show.

I see the cast the girl that was a crazy bitch on Nip Tuck.

They did a horrible job of photo shopping Kelly into that picture with the new guy.

Kelly looks fabulous.

Nate working a coffee machine.

I know a few black people that play lacrosse ;-)

And the black kids fights on the first episode. Of course cause we are all violent.

I would leave the night club I was at where I saw one of students.

Grandma is going to be funny

High school kids drive Bentleys

Erin Silver is a bitch

What happened to Jackie Silver?

They styled Kelly so well thus far

Ethan is a punk bitch

Don't be sad Dixon you can join a nice negro sport like basketball, football or track. We sure can run

I just love how soulful these white kids sound under the direction of the other token black character.

And who is the baby daddy?

The cure for a breakup is a hookup. Hmmm

Private Plane. Wasn't Diddy just flying American Airlines cause gas is too high?

Porn producing Dad. I love it

I need to visit San Fransisco

BRENDA!!!!!!!!!!!

What the hell is Brandon doing in Belize?

I just had a thought. Does Hannah Zuckerman-Vasquez live out of district too?

Dixon ain't no snitch.

Mel Silver is still creepin. Damn

She doesn't smoke why did she have a book of matches

Do they have the same Jack and Jill bathroom Brenda and Brandon had?

Super rich charming guy. Is he supposed to be Dylan McKay 2008?

Can't wait for next week.

I Just Had to Post this

I want to thank Corren for posting this. There is so much that can be said about this but I really don't have the time. There is so much to write about with so little time. I may write about several different subject today.