Graduation Countdown

With the exception of today that I spent bullshitting, I am anticiptating my upcoming graduation. I will begin work shortly and then go out with my friend and my ls.

I will write more in a bit

Another loss

Damn it!

I swear this blog is turning into one long obituary. But I had to write. Whitney is gone.

I thought about all this because 20/20 is set to air a two hour special on the late superstar. Do I have to really watch that? I feel like I lived through it why do I have to watch it again.

Whitney Houston was so closely woven into my childhood that I never even feasibly imagined her gone. I always thought about how I felt when Stevie Wonder died or Morgan Freeman. Of course the sadness will be there but...

But Whitney!@# Teena? Heavy? and the biggest loss of them all for me MJ

Whitney, was so great so much a part of my childhood, that I never even thought of her as gone. We all talk about as friends, growing old together, but we never think of the fact that not all of us are going to make it that far. Lord I hope no one does anything cliche and post this on their facebook wall. This is not any weirdo foreshadowing. I expect to retire from Stony Brook and teach and I will continue to live as such.

Life as I know it

I have the fortunate knowlegde and experience of life before the internet and life after.

I just looked at my review sheet for my midterm tomorrow and I know I was in a complete fog the first two weeks of school. Thats ok I googled the answer

Google, easy bib, ejournals. How the hell do you young people learn

My Fear

I secretly walk around with a fear for the black men in my life. It's fear of law enforcement.

Accidental shooting

Justifiable homocide

Excessive force

My life felt threatened

Phrases often heard in the black community when describing issues with law enforcement.

Thats all I have to say about that

Writers Burnout

My last post so long ago was about writers block. I don't have writers block I have writers burnout.

Big difference. I've been reading again and that makes me happy. So what if I re read the Potter series. It ended this summer, I needed the recap in order to accurately rip apart the final film.

I think despite all the crazy it will be a good semester for me academically. The fall semester always is. If everything goes according to plan, this will be my last semester as an undergraduate.

Then what....

No idea. ...............

Being an undergraduate is my current excuse for everything (viable excuse). I'm glad I won't have the crutch anymore, but damn it will be a challenge to learn how to live. Especially after 15 years of an undergraduate career.

Reading Gogol now for my crime and punishment in World Lit class. My professor is a sweet man. The older ones with the experience and without the arrogance always make the best teachers. I'm glad for our first go at things he chose a book that is well written and interesting.

Writers Block

I've been truly neglecting this blog and I know why. I can't write a paper for school let alone write my random thoughts in my blog.

.......

If you have any ideas on how to get over writers block let me know

Slowly...Surely

Slowly Surely I walk away from that old

desperate and daze of love

caught up in the maze of love

the crazy craze of love

thought it was good

thought it was real

thought it was

but it wasn't love

This is not a test.

This is not a poast about love...its a poast about...thought it was....

Anyone can fall in love with a thought or an idea. This song is about escape to me. Thinking about a reality that doesn't exisit is a defense mechanism. You can't address the problems of today if you are are caught up the crazy craze of love and not the current reality of your life today. Why live in the world of crazy love when you are currently single? Why plan a graduation trip when you have a ton of school work in the Spring semester to complete? Don't start buying clothes for a new job that you haven't applied for that just sounds perfect to you because you thought it was....