Will Obama have to be better because he's black?

(CNN) -- Just days before he was sworn in, President Obama was giving his daughters a tour of the Lincoln Memorial when one of them pointed to a copy of Abraham Lincoln's second inaugural address carved into the wall.

Obama's 7-year-old daughter, Sasha, told her father that Lincoln's speech was really long. Would he have to give a speech as long? Obama's answer was completed by his older daughter, 10-year-old Malia.

"I said, 'Actually, that one is pretty short. Mine may even be a little longer,' " Obama told CNN recently. "At which point, Malia turns to me and says, 'First African-American president, better be good.' "

The story is light-hearted, but it touches on a delicate question: Will people hold Obama to a different standard because he is the first African-American president?

Americans appear split by race on that answer. According to a CNN/Opinion Research Corp. poll, 53 percent of blacks say the American public will hold Obama to a higher standard than past presidents because he is black. Most whites -- 61 percent -- say Obama's race will not matter in how he will be judged.

The question divided several people who were racial pioneers themselves.

Alexander Jefferson was one of the first blacks allowed to become a fighter pilot. He was a member of the Tuskegee Airmen, a group of black pilots who escorted bombers in World War II.

"We had to be twice as good to be average," he says.

Obama won't face the same pressures he did because his presidential predecessor was so inept, Jefferson says.

"No, the world is ready for him," he says. "The [George W.] Bush debacle was so depressing."

Jefferson was shot down by ground fire on his 19th mission and spent a year in German prison camps. He wrote about his POW experiences in "Red Tail Captured, Red Tail Free: Memoirs of a Tuskegee Airman and POW."

Jefferson says he dealt with the pressures of being a racial pioneer by drawing on the strength of black leaders who opened doors for him.

"I sit on the backs of everyone who came before me," says Jefferson, who attended Obama's inauguration with other Tuskegee Airmen.

Jefferson says he would have emotionally imploded if he'd thought too much about the pressures of representing all blacks and dealing with the racism he encountered when he returned home to a segregated America after the war.

"I did what I had to do so I didn't go stark-raving mad," he says. "There wasn't all this self-analysis and back and forth. I was too damn busy with a wife, a child and a mortgage."

Michele Andrea Bowen couldn't avoid a bout of constant self-analysis. She was one of the first African-American students admitted to a doctorate program in history at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill.

"I know Obama is going to be held to a different standard," says Bowen, author of "Up at the College" and books such as "Holy Ghost Corner," which celebrate black faith and culture.

Bowen says she faced relentless scrutiny, and so will Obama.

"You know that it was hard for you to get in it, and you know they're watching you," Bowen says. "And you know that they're judging you by a critical standard that's sometimes not fair."

Bowen says a white classmate, her partner in dissertation, once confided to her that he received the same grades as she did, even though he knew his work was inferior.

"It toughened me up," Bowen says. "It can give you headaches and stomachaches. I learned you have to be thankful that God blessed you with that opportunity. At some point, you stop worrying, and you trust God."

'Would Bush have been president if he were black?'

Perhaps Obama will avoid those stomachaches because of the massive good will his election has generated. But that could change quickly if Obama makes a controversial decision or a mistake, says Andrew Rojecki, co-author of "The Black Image in the White Mind: Media and Race in America."

Rojecki says people who say Obama isn't going to be held to a different standard because of his skin color didn't pay attention to his campaign.

He says Obama had to deal with challenges that other candidates didn't have to face. Obama's run for office was almost ended by his association with his minister, the Rev. Jeremiah Wright, whose incendiary sermons shocked many.

But Republican presidential nominee John McCain's relationship with the Rev. John Hagee, who was accused of anti-Semitism, never threatened to end his campaign, Rojecki says.

"Obama was held responsible for what his minister said, and McCain was associated with Hagee, but somehow that didn't stick," says Rojecki, a communication professor at the University of Illinois at Chicago.

Even people who regard themselves as the most progressive, open-minded supporters may subconsciously hold Obama to a different standard, Rojecki says.

He says several academic studies show that it often takes people longer to associate good qualities to blacks when different faces are flashed across a screen.

"They have these stereotypes buried in their subconscious," he says. "That's why people cross the street when they see a young black man. They'd rather not take a chance."

Obama virtually had to be perfect to overcome those stereotypes, Rojecki says. He was the first black editor of the Harvard Law Review, he has an Ivy League-educated wife and adorable daughters, and he ran a great campaign.

"He's the perfect symbol of achievement," Rojecki says.

White candidates for office don't have to have an uninterrupted life of achievement to be considered for the Oval Office, Rojecki says.

"If George W. Bush were black, do you think he would be president?" Rojecki says.

Jefferson, the Tuskegee Airman, says Obama should have at least one consolation. The problems he confronts now are so immense that anyone, even someone who was considered by many to be perfect, would not be able to escape withering judgment.

"If the president was Jesus Christ, '' Jefferson says, "they would still debate if he's qualified."
SOURCE

Hey There Lonely Girl

I'm home tonight and it's by choice so I will keep this brief. I am supposed to be at the Tortured Soul show but stayed home because of work in the morning.

I'm sure I will get to see them the next time they are in town.


EDIT: Just found out Tortured Soul goes on at 1:30. Yeah glad I stayed home.



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Listening to: Tortured Soul - Love Everlasting
via FoxyTunes

The 44th President of the United States

Today I stood in the hallway of my office and witnessed something I never thought I would see. Today like every major event in my life was bittersweet. As elated as I am by this change in America I miss my father and so many others terribly. There is so much I'm feeling right now and maybe I will write more later. Now I pray for our president and his family.

The Speech

My fellow citizens:

I stand here today humbled by the task before us, grateful for the trust you have bestowed, mindful of the sacrifices borne by our ancestors. I thank President Bush for his service to our nation, as well as the generosity and cooperation he has shown throughout this transition. Forty-four Americans have now taken the presidential oath. The words have been spoken during rising tides of prosperity and the still waters of peace. Yet, every so often the oath is taken amidst gathering clouds and raging storms. At these moments, America has carried on not simply because of the skill or vision of those in high office, but because We the People have remained faithful to the ideals of our forbearers, and true to our founding documents.

So it has been. So it must be with this generation of Americans. That we are in the midst of crisis is now well understood. Our nation is at war, against a far-reaching network of violence and hatred. Our economy is badly weakened, a consequence of greed and irresponsibility on the part of some, but also our collective failure to make hard choices and prepare the nation for a new age. Homes have been lost; jobs shed; businesses shuttered. Our health care is too costly; our schools fail too many; and each day brings further evidence that the ways we use energy strengthen our adversaries and threaten our planet. These are the indicators of crisis, subject to data and statistics. Less measurable but no less profound is a sapping of confidence across our land - a nagging fear that America’s decline is inevitable, and that the next generation must lower its sights. Today I say to you that the challenges we face are real. They are serious and they are many. They will not be met easily or in a short span of time. But know this, America - they will be met.

On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear, unity of purpose over conflict and discord. On this day, we come to proclaim an end to the petty grievances and false promises, the recriminations and worn out dogmas, that for far too long have strangled our politics. We remain a young nation, but in the words of Scripture, the time has come to set aside childish things. The time has come to reaffirm our enduring spirit; to choose our better history; to carry forward that precious gift, that noble idea, passed on from generation to generation: the God-given promise that all are equal, all are free, and all deserve a chance to pursue their full measure of happiness. In reaffirming the greatness of our nation, we understand that greatness is never a given. It must be earned. Our journey has never been one of short-cuts or settling for less. It has not been the path for the faint-hearted - for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame. Rather, it has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things - some celebrated but more often men and women obscure in their labor, who have carried us up the long, rugged path towards prosperity and freedom. For us, they packed up their few worldly possessions and traveled across oceans in search of a new life. For us, they toiled in sweatshops and settled the West; endured the lash of the whip and plowed the hard earth. For us, they fought and died, in places like Concord and Gettysburg; Normandy and Khe Sahn. Time and again these men and women struggled and sacrificed and worked till their hands were raw so that we might live a better life. They saw America as bigger than the sum of our individual ambitions; greater than all the differences of birth or wealth or faction. This is the journey we continue today. We remain the most prosperous, powerful nation on Earth. Our workers are no less productive than when this crisis began. Our minds are no less inventive, our goods and services no less needed than they were last week or last month or last year. Our capacity remains undiminished. But our time of standing pat, of protecting narrow interests and putting off unpleasant decisions - that time has surely passed.

Starting today, we must pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and begin again the work of remaking America. For everywhere we look, there is work to be done. The state of the economy calls for action, bold and swift, and we will act - not only to create new jobs, but to lay a new foundation for growth. We will build the roads and bridges, the electric grids and digital lines that feed our commerce and bind us together. We will restore science to its rightful place, and wield technology’s wonders to raise health care’s quality and lower its cost. We will harness the sun and the winds and the soil to fuel our cars and run our factories. And we will transform our schools and colleges and universities to meet the demands of a new age. All this we can do. And all this we will do. Now, there are some who question the scale of our ambitions - who suggest that our system cannot tolerate too many big plans. Their memories are short. For they have forgotten what this country has already done; what free men and women can achieve when imagination is joined to common purpose, and necessity to courage. What the cynics fail to understand is that the ground has shifted beneath them - that the stale political arguments that have consumed us for so long no longer apply.

The question we ask today is not whether our government is too big or too small, but whether it works - whether it helps families find jobs at a decent wage, care they can afford, a retirement that is dignified. Where the answer is yes, we intend to move forward. Where the answer is no, programs will end. And those of us who manage the public’s dollars will be held to account - to spend wisely, reform bad habits, and do our business in the light of day - because only then can we restore the vital trust between a people and their government. Nor is the question before us whether the market is a force for good or ill. Its power to generate wealth and expand freedom is unmatched, but this crisis has reminded us that without a watchful eye, the market can spin out of control - and that a nation cannot prosper long when it favors only the prosperous. The success of our economy has always depended not just on the size of our Gross Domestic Product, but on the reach of our prosperity; on our ability to extend opportunity to every willing heart - not out of charity, but because it is the surest route to our common good. As for our common defense, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals.

Our Founding Fathers, faced with perils we can scarcely imagine, drafted a charter to assure the rule of law and the rights of man, a charter expanded by the blood of generations. Those ideals still light the world, and we will not give them up for expedience’s sake. And so to all other peoples and governments who are watching today, from the grandest capitals to the small village where my father was born: know that America is a friend of each nation and every man, woman, and child who seeks a future of peace and dignity, and that we are ready to lead once more. Recall that earlier generations faced down fascism and communism not just with missiles and tanks, but with sturdy alliances and enduring convictions. They understood that our power alone cannot protect us, nor does it entitle us to do as we please. Instead, they knew that our power grows through its prudent use; our security emanates from the justness of our cause, the force of our example, the tempering qualities of humility and restraint. We are the keepers of this legacy. Guided by these principles once more, we can meet those new threats that demand even greater effort - even greater cooperation and understanding between nations.

We will begin to responsibly leave Iraq to its people, and forge a hard-earned peace in Afghanistan. With old friends and former foes, we will work tirelessly to lessen the nuclear threat, and roll back the specter of a warming planet. We will not apologize for our way of life, nor will we waver in its defense, and for those who seek to advance their aims by inducing terror and slaughtering innocents, we say to you now that our spirit is stronger and cannot be broken; you cannot outlast us, and we will defeat you. For we know that our patchwork heritage is a strength, not a weakness. We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus - and non-believers. We are shaped by every language and culture, drawn from every end of this Earth; and because we have tasted the bitter swill of civil war and segregation, and emerged from that dark chapter stronger and more united, we cannot help but believe that the old hatreds shall someday pass; that the lines of tribe shall soon dissolve; that as the world grows smaller, our common humanity shall reveal itself; and that America must play its role in ushering in a new era of peace.

To the Muslim world, we seek a new way forward, based on mutual interest and mutual respect. To those leaders around the globe who seek to sow conflict, or blame their society’s ills on the West - know that your people will judge you on what you can build, not what you destroy. To those who cling to power through corruption and deceit and the silencing of dissent, know that you are on the wrong side of history; but that we will extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist. To the people of poor nations, we pledge to work alongside you to make your farms flourish and let clean waters flow; to nourish starved bodies and feed hungry minds. And to those nations like ours that enjoy relative plenty, we say we can no longer afford indifference to suffering outside our borders; nor can we consume the world’s resources without regard to effect. For the world has changed, and we must change with it.

As we consider the road that unfolds before us, we remember with humble gratitude those brave Americans who, at this very hour, patrol far-off deserts and distant mountains. They have something to tell us today, just as the fallen heroes who lie in Arlington whisper through the ages. We honor them not only because they are guardians of our liberty, but because they embody the spirit of service; a willingness to find meaning in something greater than themselves. And yet, at this moment - a moment that will define a generation - it is precisely this spirit that must inhabit us all. For as much as government can do and must do, it is ultimately the faith and determination of the American people upon which this nation relies. It is the kindness to take in a stranger when the levees break, the selflessness of workers who would rather cut their hours than see a friend lose their job which sees us through our darkest hours. It is the firefighter’s courage to storm a stairway filled with smoke, but also a parent’s willingness to nurture a child, that finally decides our fate. Our challenges may be new. The instruments with which we meet them may be new. But those values upon which our success depends - hard work and honesty, courage and fair play, tolerance and curiosity, loyalty and patriotism - these things are old. These things are true.

They have been the quiet force of progress throughout our history. What is demanded then is a return to these truths. What is required of us now is a new era of responsibility - a recognition, on the part of every American, that we have duties to ourselves, our nation, and the world, duties that we do not grudgingly accept but rather seize gladly, firm in the knowledge that there is nothing so satisfying to the spirit, so defining of our character, than giving our all to a difficult task. This is the price and the promise of citizenship. This is the source of our confidence - the knowledge that God calls on us to shape an uncertain destiny. This is the meaning of our liberty and our creed - why men and women and children of every race and every faith can join in celebration across this magnificent mall, and why a man whose father less than sixty years ago might not have been served at a local restaurant can now stand before you to take a most sacred oath. So let us mark this day with remembrance, of who we are and how far we have traveled. In the year of America’s birth, in the coldest of months, a small band of patriots huddled by dying campfires on the shores of an icy river. The capital was abandoned. The enemy was advancing. The snow was stained with blood. At a moment when the outcome of our revolution was most in doubt, the father of our nation ordered these words be read to the people: “Let it be told to the future world…that in the depth of winter, when nothing but hope and virtue could survive…that the city and the country, alarmed at one common danger, came forth to meet [it].” America. In the face of our common dangers, in this winter of our hardship, let us remember these timeless words. With hope and virtue, let us brave once more the icy currents, and endure what storms may come. Let it be said by our children’s children that when we were tested we refused to let this journey end, that we did not turn back nor did we falter; and with eyes fixed on the horizon and God’s grace upon us, we carried forth that great gift of freedom and delivered it safely to future generations.

Current Mood: Regret

It's 9am and in three hours we will have a new President of the United States. I set up the DVR to record pretty much the entire day on two different channels so I miss nothing. Watching it on TV is great but I would have loved to say that I was there when history was made. If I have children I hope they realize the importance of this day. I'm glad they will come into a world where a black president is even possible. For them they will see the world through a different lens. They will see that they can be anything if they work hard. I understand the political changes and turmoils that our new President will face for the next eight years but I can't think about that now. For now I can just think my president is black.

Just 50 Years Ago

September 15, 1963, Four girls: Addie Mae Collins (aged 14), Denise McNair (aged 11), Carole Robertson (aged 14), and Cynthia Wesley (aged 14) were killed at the 16th Street Baptist Church

1965 Alabama

Breach of Peace

Freedom Riders

Whites protesting integration equating it to communism

Freedom Riders

Birmingham, AL

In 1956, Rosa Parks'was arrested for refusing to yield her seat to a white patron on a Montgomery, Alabama city bus. The bus driver had Mrs. Parks arrested, she was found guilty of disorderly conduct and that lead directly to the bus boycott, the civil rights movement, and civil disobediance.

Bertha Gilbert, 22, is led away by police after she tried to enter a segregated lunch counter in Nashville, Tenn., in this May 6, 1964, file photo.

Albany, GA 1962

On the orders of Bull Connor, high-pressure firehoses are used against young demonstrators

Young non-violent warriors under arrest

Rev. Fred Shuttlesworth leading marchers in prayer just before they are arrested in early April.

Birmingham 1963

The Drum Major Instinct

41 years ago, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. was taken from us by an assassin's bullet. As I approach my 30th year his death has even more meaning for me because he left us after only 39 years. In 39 years he accomplished many things. One of the biggest marks that I feel he left was courage. He knew what he was doing and the consequences that came with it, but he continued anyway. He left a wife, children and many friends so my life can be easier.

Marksandlin posted speech this of Dr. King's on twitter today and his words can make the hair on the back of your neck stand up. Dr. King knew what he was put on this earth to do and knew the amount of time he had was short. In that time he defined greatness, he defined what he wanted his life to mean and how he wanted it described when he was gone. Dr. King was a Drum Major for righteousness, a Drum Major for peace and a Drum Major for integrity.

I try to listen to everyone's opinion regarding the future of this country and I can understand why there are black conservatives that are skeptical. I think that skepticism goes beyond political belief but goes to the state of Black America in recent generations. The Black America of the 50's and 60's is dying out slowly. I am a member of an organization that has been around for the last 89 years. We have survived the Great Depression, World War II, Korean War, Vietnam War, multiple assassinations of our leaders and participated in the Civil Rights movement (after all of this 8 years of Bush should be a breeze). My sorors from this time and others had nothing so worked for everything. I hate to say it but my generation had everything given to them. I am even skeptical will Black America rise to the challenge? Will they answer our President's call to service? Will they stand with him or try to ride his coat tails and expect him to carry them?

Dr. King said greatness was to serve others. I don't believe my place is on the national stage. I know I can serve in my community and who knows there maybe something I can do to help prepare the next person to lead. Our President is one man and he cannot do it alone. I hope for the next eight years we answer his call. I hope this renewed sense of self esteem is not fleeting and we continue for the fight is far from over. There are still people in this world that hate us that question or place in the world and feel we do not have the same human rights as them. *cough,cough*

My wish for the next very difficult four years is a true sense of change and that change must come from us and not President Elect Obama. He has answered his call now it is time for us to answer ours.

Help realize the dream

Life in Photos

‘What I Want for You — and Every Child in America’

By President-elect Barack Obama
Publication Date: 01/14/2009

Dear Malia and Sasha,

I know that you’ve both had a lot of fun these last two years on the campaign trail, going to picnics and parades and state fairs, eating all sorts of junk food your mother and I probably shouldn’t have let you have. But I also know that it hasn’t always been easy for you and Mom, and that as excited as you both are about that new puppy, it doesn’t make up for all the time we’ve been apart. I know how much I’ve missed these past two years, and today I want to tell you a little more about why I decided to take our family on this journey.

When I was a young man, I thought life was all about me—about how I’d make my way in the world, become successful, and get the things I want. But then the two of you came into my world with all your curiosity and mischief and those smiles that never fail to fill my heart and light up my day. And suddenly, all my big plans for myself didn’t seem so important anymore. I soon found that the greatest joy in my life was the joy I saw in yours. And I realized that my own life wouldn’t count for much unless I was able to ensure that you had every opportunity for happiness and fulfillment in yours. In the end, girls, that’s why I ran for President: because of what I want for you and for every child in this nation.

I want all our children to go to schools worthy of their potential—schools that challenge them, inspire them, and instill in them a sense of wonder about the world around them. I want them to have the chance to go to college—even if their parents aren’t rich. And I want them to get good jobs: jobs that pay well and give them benefits like health care, jobs that let them spend time with their own kids and retire with dignity.

I want us to push the boundaries of discovery so that you’ll live to see new technologies and inventions that improve our lives and make our planet cleaner and safer. And I want us to push our own human boundaries to reach beyond the divides of race and region, gender and religion that keep us from seeing the best in each other.

Sometimes we have to send our young men and women into war and other dangerous situations to protect our country—but when we do, I want to make sure that it is only for a very good reason, that we try our best to settle our differences with others peacefully, and that we do everything possible to keep our servicemen and women safe. And I want every child to understand that the blessings these brave Americans fight for are not free—that with the great privilege of being a citizen of this nation comes great responsibility.

That was the lesson your grandmother tried to teach me when I was your age, reading me the opening lines of the Declaration of Independence and telling me about the men and women who marched for equality because they believed those words put to paper two centuries ago should mean something.

She helped me understand that America is great not because it is perfect but because it can always be made better—and that the unfinished work of perfecting our union falls to each of us. It’s a charge we pass on to our children, coming closer with each new generation to what we know America should be.

I hope both of you will take up that work, righting the wrongs that you see and working to give others the chances you’ve had. Not just because you have an obligation to give something back to this country that has given our family so much—although you do have that obligation. But because you have an obligation to yourself. Because it is only when you hitch your wagon to something larger than yourself that you will realize your true potential.

These are the things I want for you—to grow up in a world with no limits on your dreams and no achievements beyond your reach, and to grow into compassionate, committed women who will help build that world. And I want every child to have the same chances to learn and dream and grow and thrive that you girls have. That’s why I’ve taken our family on this great adventure.

I am so proud of both of you. I love you more than you can ever know. And I am grateful every day for your patience, poise, grace, and humor as we prepare to start our new life together in the White House.

Love, Dad

Swagger Like WHAT!@!

Let me tell you about swagger about a man's flow. Some men have it and most men don't. To me real swagger is when a man, even if he is not that attractive, captivates you with the aura that is him.

The first example of real man swagger that I can recall was 1998, at the SUNY Albany gym. SUNY Albany had a concert featuring Cocoa Brothers, Jay Z and Busta Rhymes. How things change where I went to a concert that Busta had top billing over Jay. I was there for Busta I paid my $15 to see him. Jay Z came on the stage and I will never forget it. He was wearing a Jets football jersey, some blue jeans and some timbs. After one song I said to Jamie Busta who? I was mesmerized by Jay and there have been other men that have come into my life that have "it", but none like Jay until...

Our president elect.


What can I say about the man that hasn't been said before. During this long campaign I admired the man. Several times on this blog I have praised our president elect for his choice of a strong black woman as his life partner. I have admired his intellect and his approach to life and politics. Since he has been elected we have seen another side to our President elect. He is still giving us his all but now we also see him vacationing, playing golf, and spending time with his children. I've admired the mind but after a recent family vacation in Hawaii we saw more of the man.

WHAT!!!!!
YEAH!!!!!!
OK!!!!!!!

Michelle Obama gets to lay down next to that every night. I'm hatin hardbody

This may seem small but this video sealed the deal for me in makin the President elect's swagger bigger than anyone else.




This video shows me our new president is like me. I totally understand why Southerners who had to drop out in the third grade voted for Bush. President-elect is just another black kid from the suburbs. We know how to act when we are around white folks and when we are in a social setting our innate urban tendencies come to light. Just check the examples at 1:08 and at the end of the video.

Ahhh!!!

It's like I'm 13 and I have a new crush.

EDIT: I am not the only one that recognizes the swagger. Start at 3:38

To the left To the left

In the last few weeks, I've been bombarded with stories of breakups and bitter dudes

I will add a personal story to the list.

My friend from work went to another coworker (a girl we are both cool with) to tell her about the breakup. The coworker responded with "I'm sure Jess is really happy that you are single again now you have more time to spend with her"

What thee fuck!$!#%

Why would I be happy about a friend of mine breaking up with the guy she has been with for over a year. This was a guy that she talked about marriage with.

My friend said to my coworker, "Jess is has a full life she goes out more than me."

A week after we broke up I was at my frat brothers' barbecue a week later. People like to tell me that I'm strong but its really pride. I'm going to be sad but I'm not going to do the pity party because I'm single. Well OK I won't like I did the pity party a Saturday or two but a girl is entitled.

What would (even if you were thinking it) make you say such a thing. The only thing I can think of is before she got engaged that is what her life was like.


I saw this next story on Okayplayer. This chick made up this account on Twitter which has only two updates but brings you to this blog.

I ask females that I know all the time what do sites like this help mend a broken heart? Will returning a kidney change the fact that your wife cheated on you? I guess I shouldn't judge but there has to be a better way to deal with a loss other than bitterness and revenge. Or maybe pride is truly one of the seven deadly sins. Maybe my crying on the inside routine is no better than throwing a brick through someones window. (I never did that. A girl I know did. Not his window but his mother's house. They are married now)

What I wonder now is should I call the coworker out for what she said.



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Listening to: U2 - Pride
via FoxyTunes

Cocaine is one helluva Drug

Give it to me Baby!!!






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Listening to: Rick James - Give It To Me Baby
via FoxyTunes

Dream a Little Dream of Me

I haven't had a restful night sleep in over a week. I don't believe that dreams are premonitions. I believe that dreams are things that are weighing heavily on your mind that you can't resolve in your waking state but they carry over to your sleep. Well my issues are carrying over to my sleep and keeping me from getting a good night's rest.

I guess I will start with last nights dream first. It was me and my mother in a bridal shop. The first dress I tried on and the one I would have never picked for myself is what looked perfect. Me and my mother decided after that dress I didn't have to try anymore on.

The Dream Moods Interpretation

If you are single and dream that you are a bride, represents your desires for marriage. Alternatively, it may represent the most feminine qualities about yourself. The dream may also symbolize purity and virginal qualities.

No mystery here. I truly doubt it had anything to do with purity and virginal qualities. What I don't understand is for as much as I do want to be married I never want to rush into something just to be married. I always thought I had more control over my emotions I wouldn't let some emotional need take over what I know what I want in my head.

The other dreams I've had all have to do with money. Every time I close my eyes I see a bill that I'm paying or supposed to pay.

The Dream Moods Interpretation

To see bills in your dream, suggests that your mind is preoccupied with financial and money matters. You may be feeling overwhelmed with life's demands.

Of course I'm preoccupied with financial concerns everyone is our country is in a recession. I hope I'm not overwhelmed by life's demands. I know oh too well that it can be much worse than it is now.

I know the issues I just wish I didn't have to deal with them while I sleep.



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Listening to: Otis Redding - I've Got Dreams to Remember
via FoxyTunes

Dream Moods: What is in Your Dream?

You are entering a mysterious and fascinating world of dreams where the rules of reality do not apply. We hope that Dream Moods will help you make sense of your dreams and achieve a better understanding of them. We're dedicated to helping you find the key to unlocking and interpreting the meanings to your dreams. By understanding your dreams, you will gain a better perspective on your life. We realize that your dreams are unique. No other individual can have your background, your emotions, or your experiences. Every dream is connected with your own "reality". Thus, in interpreting your dreams, it is important to draw family: from your personal life and experiences. Remember that a dream unifies the body, mind, and spirit. It provides you with insight into ourselves and a means for self-exploration. In understanding your dreams, you will have a better understanding and discovery of your true self. So stay awhile -- explore, discover, have fun, make friends, and find out what's in YOUR dream?! SOURCE

What to Write About Tonight

I had a thought.

I wanted my blog to be something more about politics, relationships and lack there of. When I get the feeling this way I visit various news sites to see what else is going on in the world. The only stories that catch my eye of course are the ones about politics. Since the election ended I've had my fair fill of the politics. I know when President elect Obama finally takes office Sean Hannity will give me enough to write about.

The story I just posted about combines relations and politics. I was born into the Reagan years. The years were government was bad and needed to be cut down. Reagan believed that private organizations should support charities and people have the ability to help themselves. Instead of private organizations helping people places like NYC became segregated by class. You had the rich elite living very well on the upper east side and a few blocks north in urban cities such as Harlem, rampant unemployment and crack became king.

Even though I was a toddler at that time I'm sure the Hannity's and the O'Reily's of the world felt this is what life should be like. Life was good for them because of hard work and not a system of inherited wealth. Thirty years later we have a major shift in Reagan's view of America.

Now I know this article was meant to be facetious but at the same time you have to look at the message behind the words. Reagan's America worked for some and forgive me for saying this but sometimes I think Obama's America will only work for some. The older I get the more I feel I am becoming more of a moderate. My hope for the next four years is the Democratic President, Congress and Senate don't get too overzealous with the help this country needs. I hope they help people help themselves for than anything.

It's funny. When I started writing I wasn't sure if I was going to write about politics or porn.

Americans 'too depressed' for sex, porn barons seek US bailout

Posted Thu Jan 8, 2009 1:10pm AEDT

Two porn moguls, including Hustler magazine founder Larry Flynt, are seeking a $US5 billion ($7 billion) bailout from Washington, arguing that the limp US economy has thrown cold water on the adult entertainment industry.

Flynt and Girls Gone Wild video series creator Joe Francis asked the newly convened 111th Congress "to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America" in a bailout move similar to the one set aside for US car makers.

"Congress seems willing to help shore up our nation's most important businesses, (and) we feel we deserve the same consideration," Mr Francis said in a statement.

"In difficult economic times, Americans turn to entertainment for relief. More and more, the kind of entertainment they turn to is adult entertainment."

The pair were quick to admit that "the $US13 billion industry is in no fear of collapse, but why take chances?"

Mr Francis, recently imprisoned for nearly a year on a prostitution-related charge after pleading no contest in a plea bargain, cited industry figures that show adult DVD sales and rentals decreasing 22 per cent in 2008, as people turn to the internet for pornography.

With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind," Mr Flynt said.

"It's time for Congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America. The only way they can do this is by supporting the adult industry and doing it quickly."

Mr Flynt said people were "too depressed to be sexually active."

"This is very unhealthy as a nation. Americans can do without cars and such, but they cannot do without sex."

SOURCE

Hey There Lonely Girl

Another Saturday night in my series of what my weekends look like these days. The ironic thing about these posts is I used to love being home on a Saturday night. It was my time to really do me. Then he came along and changed all that. Damn him I say.

I'm actually writing earlier than I normally do because I'm tired. I'm at my mother's house but I cooked dinner just now. Between that and last night's step practice I'm worn out. Getting old is a bitch.

My friend called me today. She hadn't spoken to her boyfriend in two weeks and decided to drive to his house at 2am. When parked outside of his house she saw him walk into his apartment with two females. As soon as they walked in she slashed the tires of his car and went drinking with a friend. After drinking large amounts of alcohol she waited in his driveway. We are now at about 7:45 am and that is when I got the text followed by the phone call. That early morning call could be why I am so tired now.

I asked her why she was there and she said she needed to tie up loose ends and get her stuff. I was half asleep we agree to talk later. When we talk later she tells me she has more planned for him but would not tell me what. I really don't need to know but will admit that I am curious.

I asked my friend will vandalism and violence change what he did? She said no. So why do it? While I was talking to her I thought about me and the ex. We both had issues but his is what doomed our relationship. He is pretty immature for someone 37. Never did I wish him harm or try to destroy any of his personal property. I guess its different because he didn't string me along and he didn't lie to me. But the boyfriend before that did lie and did hurt me deeply but I never wished him harm either. My fatal flaw and unrealistic wish for all of my exes was for them to change so we can be together again. But I never expressed that to them I just let it be.

I will try my best to steer her away from violence but I guess everyone deals with loss in their own way. I don't want to tell her what to do but I would be re missed if I didn't mention that vandalism and violence are kind of against the law.

I found out this week that I have a reader or two. At first I felt some type of way but Daniella knocked me back to reality. First of all you can't really bare your self to blogger.com and expect privacy. Second maybe my rants, trails and tribulations would help someone else. I enjoying helping people and if someone can find some sort of solace in my past issues that so be it. I put all of my frustrations about so many aspects of myself on here and its kept me from doing something silly. Most importantly it's kept me from breaking the law. Blogging can't be every one's escape. I'm going to try to help my friend but something more productive with her time than vengeance.



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Listening to: Carrie Underwood - Before He Cheats
via FoxyTunes

How Obama Got Elected.Com

I went to this website at first for excerpts from the Sarah Palin interview. I was in shock and awe when I saw it this morning on the news and I wanted to write about it. I couldn't get past the fact that a person was going through this much trouble and had this much bitterness but then I remembered Michael Moore. This is the conservative response to Fahrenheit 911.

On to Sarah Palin. What I don't understand about her is the fact that the more she tries to explain herself the bigger ditch she creates. She has yet to redeem herself from anything she said. She looks great though.

Governor Palin says:
Why do people receive their news source from these anonymous bloggers?

My response:
Governor Palin rumours have been around since the sandbox. Your a public figure when you choose a public life you have to leave yourself open to public scrutiny. If we shouldn't be listening to anonymous bloggers I want to know where did she get the info that President elect Obama was palling around with terrorists and he is not an American and he is a Muslim. I've never seen that info other than people's opinions. What she doesn't mention is the fact that it was not bloggers but our President elect who told the media to back off of Bristol Palin

Governor Palin says: womp womp womp womp

I'm two minutes into the interview and I'm already tired of the bitching and the complaining so you all should know how I feel about Governor Palin.

Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?

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I just had to write today.

I've been so damned busy at work that I haven't had the time to really sit down and let the stream flow but I've been itching to do it. Maybe when I'm at my Mom's house and sitting in my usual writing spot I will have more to say.


Me and me peoples from work today spent the entire day talking about this man. I mean giving your wife a kidney is just as bad as having a baby to make the relationship work. No baby or kidney can fix what is broken.

Would I donate a kidney to my husband. Yes. Even if he was an asshole. We must remember there are three sides to every story. Your side, his side and the truth. I'm sure she will have something different to say about this situation. I kind of believe him. He sure played the man scorned well pretty well. I'm sure Tyler Perry is taking notes as we speak.

Before my tangent I will explain myself on why I would give a kidney to an asshole. I would because I couldn't look my kids in the eye and tell them I let your father die because he was a bad husband. Life changes so much when you have kids at least it should. Your self should not be the priority in this situation. You must remember you are the one that chose to marry the asshole but the kids could not chose their father. I can understand why the guy is mad but he really shouldn't be. I kind of want to ask, "Why you mad son?" I refuse to believe that he didn't know she was a ho when he married her. You can't make a ho a housewife no matter how hard you tried. That is where he fucked up.

Would I ask for it back? No. But not for the reason you maybe thinking. I have way to much pride. I would probably write a book off of the experience but I wouldn't ask you for my kidney back. I wouldn't give you the satisfaction of knowing you hurt me so bad that I needed my vital organs returned. We are in America and here we profit off of pain. I guess he really can't get money from her and this is the only way he can stick it to her.

To play devil's advocate for a sec, she probably worked that new kidney all over Suffolk County. I'm sure she went drinking, partying out to fancy restaurants with his kidney. I would have an attitude but you can't make a ho a housewife. I'm surprised no one told him that.

Listening to: Amy Winehouse - Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow
via FoxyTunes

Husband in divorce case wants wife's kidney back--or $1.5M

Doc from Ronkonkoma wants donated organ -- or equal value -- back from wife as part of divorce settlement
BY CHAU LAM and AND RIDGELY OCHS chau.lam@newsday.com ridgely.ochs@newsday.com
9:33 PM EST, January 7, 2009

When Dr. Richard Batista's wife needed a kidney, he gave her one of his.And now that Dawnell Batista has filed for a divorce, he wants it back.If he can't get the kidney, his attorney, Dominic Barbara of Garden City, said Wednesday that his client wants $1.5 million -- which, he said, reflects in part the value of the kidney transplant.Dawnell Batista, 44, of Massapequa, could not be reached and her attorney, Douglas Rothkopf of Garden City, declined to comment in detail.

"The facts will speak for themselves and they're not as represented by Dr. Batista," Rothkopf said.Medical ethicists agreed that the case is a nonstarter. Arthur Caplan of the University of Pennsylvania's Center for Bioethics said the likelihood of Batista getting either his kidney or cash was "somewhere between impossible and completely impossible."Robert Veatch, a medical ethicist at Georgetown University's Kennedy Institute of Ethics, noted that "it's illegal for an organ to be exchanged for anything of value." Organs in the United States may not be bought or sold. Donating an organ is a gift and legally, "when you give something, you can't get it back," he said."It's her kidney now and . . . taking the kidney out would mean she would have to go on dialysis or it would kill her," Veatch said.Barbara said his client isn't really looking for Dawnell Batista to give back her kidney. "Does he really want the kidney back? Of course not," he said.Batista said his aim instead was to draw attention to her not allowing him agreed-upon visitation with the couple's three children, ages 14, 11 and 8.Batista, 49, of Ronkonkoma, said he donated his kidney to his wife in June 2001, after she had undergone two other failed transplants when her kidneys ceased working."My first priority was to save her life," Batista said at a news conference in Garden City. "The second bonus was to turn the marriage around."Batista, a surgeon at Nassau University Medical Center since 1992, said the marriage had been shaky because of his wife's illness.Initially, Batista said he was happy with his gift of life: "I was walking on a cloud. I did the right thing for her and to this day I would do it again."Dawnell Batista, a nurse, filed for divorce in July 2005, and her husband countersued that same year. The demand for the kidney was not part of the original countersuit, but was introduced Wednesday, Barbara said.Barbara said the $1.5 million his client feels he's entitled to reflects damages, including how much money she made as a result of being able to continue working and not having to go on dialysis. "A price can't be placed on a human organ but it does have value," he said.Caplan disagreed. "There's nothing later you can get in terms of compensation if you regret your gift," he said.Staff writer John Valenti contributed to this story. SOURCE

New Year's Revelations

Hello Blog,

I waited a few days to write the new year. I spent most of the first few days of the year watching Law and Order SVU. I wanted to pay careful attention to what I wrote and this time of year its hard to think of anything else but resolutions. We are bombarded with advertisements of get out of debt, weight loss and exercise. It's quite comical to me that we accept this bombardment as good ole fashioned capitalism but to me it is "profiting off of someones pain".

I say profit off of pain because these people bank on the fact that the new year brings up the same insecurities they had the year before. New Year is supposed to be a fresh start and it is for some. Some people take January 1 and make a fresh start. I decided to take a look at myself and thought, "Am I really that bad off".

I call this my New Year's Revelation. I'm not exactly where I want to be or where I thought I would be but I'm far from the bottom. I thought to myself the following:

I wanted a better job and a good education. I could have worked closer to home but I chose to work at the place that would educate me the best. I wanted better so I went back to school. Not easy for some.

Since I first walked into Andrea Hill's home now over 15 years ago I was introduced to Zeta Phi Beta Sorority, Inc.. When I first arrived in Albany I was not mentally ready for the journey I needed to take to get there. Eight years later...well your never fully ready for that journey but I saw the opportunity and took it. I just wish Andrea was alive to see it.

Now for the last revelation I had (well it wasn't the only one but you get the point). For many years I've always said I need to live on my own. I never wanted to go from my mother's house to the home I would make a family in with my husband (whomever he may be). I wanted to get my finances together and slowly but surely they are because of the help I sought from a financial advisor. My apartment maybe small but I can afford my rent and it's just me.

Now for the things I wish to accomplish. Because of facebook I was reminded of the person I used to be. I was actually healthy. I have never been this size in my life and the people in my life that love me worry for me. I see the drawbacks to being overweight and I don't want to live my life with constant health issues. I have to work on that.

I would love to have a baby. This is not a goal because it's not going to happen this year but I just want the record to show if I had it my way I would have a baby by now. Possibly working on #2. Now this baby fantasy includes a husband as much as I want a baby I don't want to raise him/her on my own.

I wish the focus was not so much on personal change for the new year. We all know you will never really change if you feel defeated when you begin. When you start any program with such high expectations you just set yourself up for failure. I hope to continue to write this year and use my blog as a tool to help me accomplish my goals.