Hey There Lonely Girl

Hey there lonely girl...

I haven't written as much as I would like for several reasons. First I have lots of school work (a test and paper due tomorrow), and in my apartment I don't have wireless Internet. I'm so accustomed to sitting in my bed typing that its hard for me to do it at a desk. I would like to get a new desk for my apartment. I really don't need it but I want it. I need my apartment to feel like my own and I think the way to do that is with personal touches.

I call this entry hey there lonely girl because my Saturday nights lately have been following a certain theme. At home (in my mother's house), with some DVD's from Netflix and some kind of fast food.

Dana told me she signed up for meetup.com and joined a few groups and I went online and took a look. I started to join a few groups but then I thought what is the point. I am a member of the greatest sorority in the world (I love my Z PHI!) and I have access to fundraisers and club events every weekend if I so chose. If I have all of this why do I stay home?

I am still sad
I still miss him
I miss the idea of him

When I say I miss the idea of him I mean being in a relationship. Before I met him I could only think of myself with the other guy. But then I met him and the other one just became someone I was with when I was 21.

I loved being in his house and it just being us. I miss going to the movies and going out to dinner. I miss those walks on the promenade. I would love to go back to those places again but is it right since I went there with him.

I finally have what I want. I have my own place. I can go and go as I please. I can walk around my apartment naked. When I step on cold tile I don't have anyone telling me to put on slippers.

I guess I just need to give it some time. Time to adjust and really figure out what I want.